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| To Have Or Not To Have Kids… |

Last week Tuesday, I had a very interesting conversation with one of my friends. To be honest, I cannot remember the baseline of that conversation but I sure as hell remember where and how it ended. We were all standing around in my kitchen, having what regular friends would call “a civilised evening hangout”. So, we each took turns to share how we spent the previous weekend. We talked about work, family drama, meeting new people, and partying. At some point, we even got into a loud and heated argument which I’m pretty sure got my neighbors pissed as fuck. Sorry, guys 🙂

Anyway, you know how it is with these gatherings, they always somehow disintegrate into smaller gossip groups of two or three persons. That is how I ended up stuck in a group of two, me being the other member, with one of my friends, Henry. Great conversationalist on any given day, an awesome support system, a patient listener(sometimes). A good friend. He pulled me aside and we got talking about our random things.

I should probably mention that this friend and I are from two completely different worlds. Literally! We do not have the same beliefs. We do not hang out with the same crowd. We do not eat the same kind of food. So, yea we do not agree on lots and lots of things. You are probably wondering, well, why the fuck are you guys friends? What do you say to each other apart from the superficial things that you can pretty much talk to a supermarket stranger about? Ok! Take a chill pill and I will tell you what we talked about on this fateful evening.


Last week Tuesday, we talked about random topics like, our new annoying colleagues, old annoying colleagues, old friends we miss, backstabbers, and the likes. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, the conversation led us to discussing kids. Having kids. Very random. So, he asked me why humans of my kind have kids. In the middle of my second glass of home-made mojito, I looked at him as a total freak that he is and asked why that question was of relevance to him? He responded quite confidently, that he sees the way human children are treated. He sees the bad conditions some human kids are born into which would have been avoided if their parents decided wisely. The way some human kids are loved more than others simply because there is a genetical bond between them. How humans subject their young ones into physical and psychological pain. And that, he thinks, humans are less than smart to keep having kids just because they have access to sexing each other without caution in other to satisfy some quick rush of emotion. He continued, that humans are not considerate and very thoughtful of a future that does not directly affect them. Human children, he believes are by extension a possession and a show of status quo in the human society and that is why a lot of humans are coaxed unconsciously into believing that replicating themselves will somehow prove a point.


At this point, it was a bit hard not to agree with him because as a human, I knew that most of what he said was true, even though poorly articulated. I could not argue with that. With a big smirk on my face, I told him that those were some very valid points. However, he should cut us some slack. In an effort to redeem my people, I did the only human thing I knew by putting my tail between my leg and hitting him right below the belt. So I held nothing back or at least, so I thought.


First of all, Henry, you are not a Discus. You are not of the Discus clan. What! I could tell that from the way he looked at me, that my point had hit him hard(HHHH- see what I did there? No? Whatever!) I’m sure you have a lot to say about our bad parenting skills and poor parental care because you are just bitter from your traumatized childhood. Yes, Henry, I know all about your childhood and how your parents treated you like crab, so it is absolutely fine for you to take it out on humans. Lashing out, whenever you can. It is a known fact, that most parents in your community leave their freshly born infants to fend for themselves. Pretty damaging huh. So before you judge my people about their reckless life decisions into bringing new lives to earth totally unprepared, why don’t you think about how horrible some of your people are with regards to parenting.

You must be thinking, c’mon Idy, you know damn well that Henry is right and you are wrong for blaming him for the way his parents treated him. I know that too but I couldn’t help it. I just could not help being petty. Anyway, we went on and on about other human flaws which I tried to counter with lots of other human kindness.

To be fair, his points were pretty solid and I had to give up at some point. It’s hard to win an argument with a fish anyway.


I hope you guys have a wonderful weekend, so you can tell your friends all about it next week Tuesday.

Don’t forget to connect with me on Instagram and Facebook, for new post updates.

N/B: Most fish abandon their young at hatching, but not discus fish. Researchers have discovered that discus fish parent like mammalian mothers. Not only do the parents feed their young from mucus secreted on their surfaces, but the nutritional and immunological content of the mucus changes as the young develop, much like mammalian milk. – Journal of Experimental Biology


2 thoughts on “| To Have Or Not To Have Kids… | Leave a comment

  1. Personally, I feel it is okay if you don’t want to have kids. Societal expectation make people who have no likingbfor children and who expect to be bad parents become parents just because you must be a parent.
    Most children are product of konji as we say in Nigeria – meaning sexual urge rather than a conscious plan to have kids, leading to kids parents didn’t plan and kids people can’t parent. It is both a familial and societal disaster when viewed with a peek intibthe future – homelessnes, illiteracy, poor health, addiction to vices and poverty.
    I agree with your friend.

    Liked by 1 person

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